21 Ways to Make a Guy Obsessed With You (Without Being Creepy)!

Ever wondered what makes a guy absolutely smitten by you? Like can’t-stop-thinking-about-you, butterflies-erupting-in-his-belly smitten?

Here’s the secret—you being YOU. No lies, no faking, no phonies. Just a gal who’s authentic, confident, and genuinely interested in him.

But I know. We all get pre-date jitters. What if I come on too strong? What if he thinks I’m not interested? Should I play hard to get?

No girl, all you need to do is take a breather. Relax. It’s not as hard as you think.

Healthy attraction is pretty simple to navigate—all you need is a few tips to put your best self out there without over or under-doing it.

So, grab a coffee and ditch the dating drama cause you’re about to get some real advice on how to make a guy obsessed with you (in a good way)!

Chapter 1: Make him melttt.

Let’s swap places for a minute here. If you were THE guy, how would you like to be treated?

Some special treatment sprinkled with loads of love, admiration, and support? That’s exactly what men want, too!!!

1. Be his spotlight.

No, I’m not talking about showering him with empty compliments. But little reminders that make him feel seen.

Does he have a good sense of humor? Tell him that.

Did he try a new hairstyle? Don’t let that go unnoticed!

2. Master the art of listening.

Active listening is the key to any strong relationship. So, the next time he shares something with you—be it a funny story, a deep feeling, or literally anything, make sure you participate in that conversation.

Ask him follow-up questions if you have any. Put away your phone when he’s talking to you (because that TikTok can wait). Show that you’re engaged, make eye contact, and be expressive.

3. Don’t shy away from being curious about him.

If you’re interested in him, show it. Ask him engaging questions and explore his answers (because this is not an interview, duh!).

Find out what he likes—his interests, hobbies, strengths. And what he doesn’t—his fears, pet peeves, and so on.

Here’s a cheat sheet to get you started:

What made you choose this field of career?
What was your childhood dream?
If you could have any superpower, what would it be?

4. Be his smile machine!

Tease him a bit and make him blush. Laugh together, cry together (because of laughing), and find humor in the ordinary.

There’s nothing more attractive than a funny woman, after all.

5. Plan surprises and shower him with love.

A surefire way to make him melt is to surprise him when he expects it the least. Recreate your first date, take him to his favorite cafe, and speak his love language.

Because if he’s putting in the effort, you’ve got to match the energy girl!

6. Don’t forget the “Thank You’s”

Here’s a fun fact about me (and possibly about you)—I easily get overwhelmed and space out when someone does something nice to me. To the extent that I forget to thank them!

So, if it happens to you, remember to recognize his efforts no matter how big or small. You don’t have to say “thank you” every single time. A tight hug or a kiss would do that too!

Chapter 2: Your It-factor

Your personality plays a crucial role in attracting a guy. But that doesn’t mean you need to manipulate yourself into being someone you are not.

Remember, authenticity is the key. Here are a few tips to let your IT factor shine:

7. Keep him guessing.

Be open. But don’t overshare everything. It’s nice (and fun) to keep guys at the edge of the seat sometimes.

You don’t have to answer everything he asks—simply end with “you’ll find out” and leave him wanting for more.

Of course, this doesn’t apply to every other conversation. But if you think it’s the right to have a playful banter, take the chance!

8. Share your vulnerabilities

You don’t have to ACT vulnerable in front of the guy. We’re not playing damsel in distress.

Rather, be open to communicating your fears and weaknesses. That will only make him realize you’re a real person, just like him.

9. Confidence is sexy!

Own yourself—your quirks, weaknesses, flaws, imperfections—basically, your AWESOMENESS!

So what if he’s not into rock music? If you love it, you talk about it with passion, girl. He is going to find it refreshing.

(Enthusiasm is infectious.)

10. You are his biggest cheerleader.

Celebrate his wins, support him through thick and thin, and be his teammate.

When you become your man’s true hype woman, you bring positive energy, empathy, and a shared connection to the table.

That’s the recipe for making a guy feel safe around you.

11. Be open and honest.

There’s nothing less attractive than phoniness and lies. So, don’t be afraid to express yourself.

If you’re playing hard to get, I’d suggest don’t stretch it unnecessarily. Don’t expect him to be a mind reader.

Rather, communicate your needs, desires, hopes, and goals. If you want a guy to trust you, be honest.

12. Show him your fun side.

Men are attracted to women who are goofy, silly, and spontaneous. Of course, that doesn’t mean you have to become reckless or idiotic.

But if you made a really bad joke, take the credit. Don’t shy away from laughing at yourself, making funny faces, being a bit cheesy, and going on last-minute adventures.

Be comfortable in your own skin and the guy will be comfortable around you!

Chapter 3: The love emotion guru

You know what really, I MEAN REALLYYY, attracts a guy?

A woman who is emotionally intelligent and grounded. Someone with whom he can share his deepest secrets, scars, and stories.

13. Show him that he can fall back on you.

When life throws shit at him, he’ll need a shoulder to lean on. Become his safe harbor where he can learn and grow without being judged.

Don’t just say you’ll be there for him, be with him when he’s in need. Lend an empathetic ear, offer a hug, and sort out his problems together.

14. Support him emotionally.

Do not ever try to downplay his feelings. Tell him that what he’s feeling is valid that he shouldn’t be ashamed.

You don’t have to offer a TED talk. Encourage him realistically. Put yourself in his shoes and try to understand what he’s going through.

15. Become adventure buddies

One of the best ways to connect emotionally with a guy is to create shared experiences. Partake in his hobbies and interests, watch his favorite shoes, and listen to his music recs.

It’s not just about spending time together but doing that meaningfully, especially when you’re just starting off.

When he notices the effort you’re making to know him, he’ll definitely reciprocate.

Chapter 4: Focus on yourself

If you want him to be obsessed with you (in a good way), you need to tone down your obsession with him. Because he will distance himself if you’re too clingy.

16. Healthy boundaries are a must for healthy obsession.

Don’t spam him with texts, because if he’s busy, you’ll only feel bad.

Figure out your needs (and his), and limit your interaction to a healthy amount. You don’t have to say yes to everything he says or agree with every single opinion of his.

Navigate disagreements calmly and respect his boundaries (highly important to keep a guy interested).

17. Do your own thing.

I know it can be hard—you keep thinking about him (if he’s thinking about you). But you have to focus on yourself and your life.

So, go about your work, dive into self-care, and do not compromise your friendships over a guy!

18. Don’t lose your authenticity.

I cannot stress this point enough. It’s really important to love yourself and never lose your uniqueness.

The tips I’ve shared in this blog are important. But if you feel there’s something that doesn’t align with your personality (like being flirty), it’s alright honey. You don’t have to force it!

Chapter 5: Let him steal the show.

I’ll be pretty quick about this one.

I know you’re independent, assertive, and self-assured. But that doesn’t mean you can’t get help from a man. Why do you have to make it more difficult than it should be? Nurture your feminine side and be acceptable of the help you can get from masculine.

If you want to have this guy in your life, see him as a partner who’s there to support you. So, take his help. Involve him in your decisions (start with small ones) and ask his opinions.

Most importantly, don’t do this just for the sake of it. Be open to his suggestions and follow his lead if it’s really good.

Chapter 6: Some extra spicy tipsss!!!

Hold up. We ain’t done yet. I’ve got some magic little love grenades that will explode in a guy’s heart:

19. Be flirty.

Men loveeeeee light-hearted banter. Flirting will only attract him more towards you. Ditch the generic compliments, be specific. Like, “Oh I love a man in a black shirt” or “You’ve got a really calming smile” or maybe “Men who know what they want are always stealing hearts!”

20. Slow burn is real.

Let this connection melt in your mouth. Savor every bit of it, and don’t rush things. That can put the guy off.

21. Connect physically.

It doesn’t have to be a full-on makeout sesh. Sweet hugs, brushing a piece of lint off his shoulder, holding hands, holding his arm while walking, playing with his hair or ear—these little gestures speak volumes.

21 Subtle Ways to Make a Guy Obsessed With You (Without Being Creepy)!