Moving on after being cheated on can feel impossible, but with these tips, you’ll be able to heal and get back out there.
You’ve been cheated on. And now you feel like your life is over. It feels like your world is ending, and you don’t know how you’ll ever be able to move on. But you can.
It’s not easy. I know. I’ve been there. I’m sorry that you’re going through this, but I want you to know there is hope.
Being cheated on is one of the most hurtful things that can happen in a relationship. You feel lied to, betrayed, and used. It’s natural to feel all of these things and more. But here’s the thing: you can’t let those feelings control you. You have to take action to get your life back on track and start moving on.
But it’s not going to be easy. It’s going to take time, energy, and a lot of effort. But I believe in you. I know that you can take control of your life again.
I’ve put together a guide to help you do just that. Follow these steps, and you’ll be on your way to healing, recovering from this traumatic experience, and moving on.
How to Move On After Being Cheated On
1. Accept What Happened & Give yourself time to heal
It’s hard to accept that your partner has cheated on you. You feel like you’ve been stabbed in the back. You feel lied to, used, and humiliated. All of these are completely natural responses, but until you accept what’s happened, you can’t move on.
You need to start by acknowledging that your partner has made a choice that is completely unacceptable. They have chosen to deceive you and put their needs before your own. This is something that you will never be able to forget, so it’s important to find a way to work through these feelings.
2. Acknowledge Your Emotions and Feelings
Cheating is a betrayal, and it can leave you feeling hurt, angry, confused, and embarrassed. You may feel like you’re not good enough, that you did something to deserve this, or that you’re not worth fighting for.
You’re going to feel all of these emotions, and that’s okay. But you need to acknowledge them and feel them before you can start to move on. Don’t try to bottle them down or ignore them. Face them head-on and allow yourself to grieve the relationship you thought you had.
3. Don’t blame yourself even a tiny bit cause It’s Not Your Fault
These are the things that you need to believe in and accept in order to move on. It’s not easy, but it’s absolutely necessary. You need to detach yourself from the situation and start thinking of yourself as an innocent party.
The person cheated because they wanted to cheat. It’s not your fault. You didn’t do anything wrong. You didn’t deserve this.
The sooner you can accept this, the sooner you can get back to being your best self.
4. Permit Yourself to Move On
It can be hard to let go and move on from the hurt, and it’s ok to take your time. But whatever you do, don’t linger for too long in the darkness of this experience—it’s not healthy. Once you feel ready, give yourself permission to move on.
Allow yourself to mourn the loss of a relationship if needed, but don’t let pity parties turn into a habit. Giving yourself permission to move on is a powerful decision that will set you free in so many ways. You may never forget what happened, but it won’t have to define your future any longer.
5. Reclaim Your Space
Create a physical and mental space to disconnect from the person who betrayed you. This means removing yourself from any places where you are likely to encounter the other person and avoiding making any contact with them.
Get rid of items in your home that remind you of the relationship and your partner, and start creating a sense of security and safety for yourself. Focus on your living space and what makes it special to you; rearrange furniture, paint a wall, or hang up artwork that reminds you of yourself and your values.
Also, do away with activities involving both of you. Try to find something that only belongs to you, something that you can enjoy purely by yourself.
6. Don’t Stalk Your Partner
No matter how much it might hurt to think your partner could be lying to you or seeing someone else, it won’t do you any good to stalk them or spy on their activities. Doing so will only create more hurt, confusion, and resentment, and it will only drag out the process of getting over being cheated on. Not to mention that it’s an invasion of privacy and could land you in legal trouble.
Instead, recognize and accept the situation, and tell yourself that this is something you need to get over as soon as possible. Stop making excuses of trying to find out what they are up to and start focusing on yourself and your own needs.
7. Take Time for Yourself Independently
Step Three is all about giving yourself some time and space to heal. It’s so important that you take this time for yourself without relying on your partner or anyone else. This is your time to mourn the relationship that you lost and to figure out what comes next for you.
During this time, it’s crucial that you focus on your own happiness. Don’t let yourself be consumed by anger, bitterness, or resentment. These emotions will only hold you back from moving on. Instead, try to focus on the good things that are still in your life.
8. Cut Contact With Your Former Partner
Letting go is a process, and cutting contact with your former partner is a necessary step. It’s best to distance yourself from them and not engage with them any further. This doesn’t mean that you can never interact with the person again. It simply means that temporarily removing yourself from the situation may provide clarity, allowing you to take control of your life again.
If you think contact is best cut off completely, even if it’s difficult, take a deep breath and do what needs to be done. For many people, this includes blocking them on social media and email, avoiding places they might be, and not talking about them or the incident with mutual friends. This will help protect you from further hurt, allow for more distance in the healing process, and make it easier for you to concentrate on yourself.
9. Build a Support System
If you have been cheated on, the best thing you can do is to build a support system. Having a good group of people to talk to and sympathize with can be essential in helping you move on from the hurt.
Find a group of people who are willing to listen and give you advice. Having friends who have gone through a similar experience can be especially helpful, as they can relate to you on a deeper level.
It’s also important to remember that it’s okay not to talk about what happened if it makes you feel uncomfortable. Sometimes, having friends simply reminds us that we are loved and supported by those around us, which is enough during this difficult time.
10. Challenge Yourself to Do Things You Enjoy
Whether it’s going for a walk, visiting the beach, reading a book, or trying out a new recipe—take the time to do something that you truly enjoy.
Make sure to push yourself out of your comfort zone too. Go ahead and take that class you’ve been thinking about, get back into yoga, or try something completely new, like stand-up paddleboarding. Not only does this help build resilience and give you some control over your life again, but it can also be incredibly therapeutic.
Take the time to appreciate the little things, too—even small victories count! Celebrate milestones in your journey with a night out with friends or a special treat for yourself. Connecting with people and doing activities that bring you joy will empower you and help restore your sense of confidence and self-worth.
11. Speak Openly About Your Experiences
Speaking openly and honestly will help you release the feelings that have been bottled up inside you, pain and anger included, and focus on rebuilding your life in a healthy way. Although it can be painful and difficult, talking about what happened can help you process and make sense of what you’ve been through.
Whether it’s with a friend or family member, don’t be afraid to open up about your experience with cheating. It may take some time for you to be ready to talk about it, and that’s okay. But when you do find the courage to do so, remember that it’s not just important for others to understand what happened; it’s also important for yourself.
12. Talk to someone who will understand, maybe a therapist
A therapist can help you process your emotions and work through any underlying traumas or issues related to the betrayal. It can also be useful to have an objective third party provide you with a different perspective on the situation.
Therapists come in all shapes and sizes, so if you don’t find yourself connecting with the first person you speak to, don’t hesitate to try someone else. Ask friends or family for referrals, and if possible, seek out someone who specializes in this type of trauma. Most importantly, go into your sessions with an open mind and be prepared to talk openly about your feelings.
13. Journal Your Feelings Out
Writing about your experience can be a great way to process your emotions and work through the hurt and betrayal. Whether you keep a journal, blog, or write letters that never get sent, the act of writing can be healing and therapeutic. It will help you untangle all the emotions that you’re feeling and process them properly, and it can even help you find solutions!
The best part about writing is that it allows you to express yourself without judgment or interruption. Plus, there’s something about putting your thoughts on paper that can help give you perspective on the situation and clarity as to how you’re really feeling.
If writing isn’t your thing, try other forms of creative self-expression like painting, drawing, or clay sculpting. Any type of expression can help you release negative emotions in a safe and healthy way while also helping you gain insight into how to move forward with strength.
14. Be super Kind to Yourself
It’s difficult to get over the pain of being cheated on, and it can be hard to go out and about when you’re feeling so low. You might be tempted to find comfort in food or alcohol, but doing this will only make things worse in the long run.
Instead, take some time to remind yourself of all your positive qualities and reflect on the good times. Give yourself a break from negative self-talk and focus on being gentle with yourself. Treat yourself with kindness and do something nice for yourself, like taking a bubble bath or going for a walk in nature.
15. Avoid Rumination
It’s so easy for us to blame ourselves when we’ve been betrayed, but it’s important to remember that it was not your fault. You didn’t do anything wrong but trust someone who let you down – and that’s on them, not you.
Try to avoid ruminating (or constantly dwelling) on the experience, as this will only lead to more heartache and pain. Don’t try to analyze the situation over and over – it won’t help the healing process in any meaningful way. Instead, remind yourself that there is no magical answer or silver lining here and that the best thing you can do is focus on yourself and how you are feeling.
16. Also, Don’t try to get even with the person who cheated on you
When it comes to dealing with someone who has cheated on you, revenge and getting even is not the way to go. Not only is it a waste of your time, energy, and emotions, but it can also have serious repercussions.
Instead, focus on ways to take care of yourself in the aftermath. Seek out support from friends or family members you trust, find healthy outlets such as hobbies or sports to express your emotions, and take time to reflect on what transpired and learn from the experience.
Whatever you do, don’t set out on a mission to get revenge – it will likely only make matters worse.
17. Learn From the Experience and Rebuild Your Self-Esteem
When you’ve been cheated on, it’s natural to feel like you’re not good enough. That’s because your partner chose to betray you, and that has to do with their perception of you, not with who you are as a person.
It’s essential that you learn from this experience and rebuild your self-esteem. This means accepting that what happened was not your fault and that you are worthy of love and respect. Spend time with people who make you feel good about yourself, and practice self-care in order to restore your sense of well-being.
Remember that it takes time to heal from a hurt like this, but with patience and perseverance, you will get there.
18. Reconnect With Yourself
Part of healing is taking the time to re-establish a connection with yourself. This includes reflecting on who you are, what your values and goals are, and what makes you happy and content. You have been through a tough situation; it’s time to take back control of your life.
Spend some time reconnecting with yourself by doing things that make you feel good. Treat yourself as a priority and do things that make you feel happy, such as listening to music, going for walks in nature, or engaging in activities that help build self-intimacy.
19. You are in fact lucky, focus on that
Now that you’ve taken the time to grieve, it’s time to focus on the positive things. Think of it as a chance to rebuild your life and start fresh.
Start by taking a moment each day to think about something that brings you joy, like your favorite hobby or food. Think of what “bright spots” there are in your life: friends, family members, or even pets! Showing gratitude for what we have in our lives can also help remind us of all there is to be thankful for—including ourselves.
20. Reconnect With Old Hobbies
Reconnecting with activities you used to enjoy can help remind you of the person you were before the cheating happened. Not to mention, having fun can also be therapeutic and help speed up your recovery.
For some, it might mean pulling out the paintbrushes and starting a new project. For others, it could be going to a yoga class or volunteering in their community. The important thing is to do something that makes you happy and keeps your mind busy.
It’s also okay if you don’t feel like doing anything at first. That’s totally normal too! Give yourself permission to take it slow and find joy in the small things. Read a book, take a bath, or just sit quietly with your thoughts—you deserve some well-deserved rest and relaxation after enduring painful heartache.
21. Rebuild New Boundaries
Now that you’ve taken the time to mourn and process your feelings, it’s time to start rebuilding. This doesn’t just have to be figurative; it can be literally rebuilding time. Take the opportunity to make high-value woman boundaries and take back control of your life.
Make sure to rebound and draw those boundaries that you may not have been familiar with before. Your new or existing relationships will be partially affected by this new boundary-making, so keep in mind that anytime someone is being disrespectful or crossing your lines, let yourself remind them in a firm voice of what those boundaries are.
You don’t want anyone taking advantage of your newfound vulnerability, so makes sure to set up a safety net for yourself with the lines you create – ones that protect both your mental and physical well-being.
22. Revamp Your Social Media Presence
It might sound silly, but revamping your social media presence can be a highly effective exercise in taking control of your life. You don’t need to delete every single post or photo – though that’s not a bad idea either – but curating the images and posts you put up on your feed is an incredibly powerful tool to take control of the narrative around your life.
Focus on posts that boost your self-confidence and remind you of what makes you special and unique. The goal is to create a more positive atmosphere for yourself on social media. Don’t worry about likes or followers, just do what feels right for you. Take this opportunity to explore creative outlets that make you feel inspired and share those works on social media. Be proud of all the things that make you one-of-a-kind!
23. Try to Forgive your partner
When all is said and done, forgiveness is the epitome of healing and moving on.
It can be incredibly hard to forgive yourself for being cheated on, especially when you blame yourself for not noticing the situation sooner. It’s important to recognize that the cheater is solely responsible for their actions and that you don’t have to carry the weight of guilt for their actions.
Once you forgive yourself, it’s important to consider whether you can forgive your partner as well. It’s up to you whether or not you want to stay with someone who has cheated, but it can be difficult to get off the ground if you can’t forgive them. Regardless, it’s necessary to acknowledge the hurt and betrayal you feel and makes a conscious effort to forgive them, either for your own sake or for the sake of your relationship.
If you can’t forgive the person yet, it’s ok, and you have the right to take as long as you feel you need.
How do I stop overthinking after being cheated on?
Recovering from being cheated on can be a difficult process, and it is natural to find yourself overthinking the situation. To stop this, try to take back control of your thoughts. Acknowledge that it was not your fault and that you cannot change what has happened.
It can also help to focus on self-care by doing activities you enjoy, like reading a book or going for a walk. Talking to friends and family about your feelings can also be beneficial. Lastly, remember that time heals, and it is possible for you to move past this experience.
Can a relationship go back to normal after cheating?
It is possible for a relationship to go back to normal after one partner has cheated. However, it will take a lot of effort and commitment from both partners. The first step is open and honest communication. Both of you should be willing to talk about your feelings, understand why the cheating happened, and come up with strategies to rebuild trust.
This process may require the help of an experienced therapist or counselor. It’s important to acknowledge that there will always be scars and that some things may never go back to how they were before. With time, patience, and dedication, it is possible for a relationship to come out stronger after infidelity.
Conclusion on how to move on after being cheated on
When someone you trust betrays you, it can feel like your world is crumbling. The pain of being cheated on can be all-consuming, and it’s hard to know how to move on. But it is possible.
Following these steps can help you reclaim your life and move on after being cheated on. Remember, you are not alone, and there is light at the end of the tunnel. You will get through this.
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