Are you concerned that your relationship isn’t healthy? Uncover the top red flags in a relationship and start building a safe, loving connection.
Relationships are meant to be fulfilling in nature. When in a relationship, you should experience a sense of togetherness, bliss, and peace of mind. Being in a team and navigating smoothly through different courses of life alongside your partner is perhaps one of the best feelings in the world.
But what if your relationship feels like a burden to you? Instead of experiencing that calm, if you feel a constant heartache, babe, know that you need to talk it out!
Whether you two have just started dating, or are in a relationship for years now, or have been married for a couple of months/years, red flags may appear all of a sudden!
Chances are that you have been aloof from these red flags as your heart and soul are swept with love. But being blind in love can actually prove to be quite damaging to you and your mental health in the long run.
So, your girl is here to help you identify the red flags in your relationship (if any). I have prepared this complete guide just to help you recognize the warning signs so that your heart does not break into pieces later on.
Read on to know which red flags you should keep an eye on and how to proceed in case things are not really good!
What are Red Flags in a Relationship anyway?
Red flags in a relationship are telltale signs that all is not good between the two of you. Rather, when you pay attention, you will notice unhealthy patterns that repeat themselves every now and then, leaving you drained of all your energy.
Consider red flags as signs that indicate your incompatibility with your partner. Maybe your partner is manipulative, or he is extremely abusive. Maybe he feels insecure for no reason, or you find him lying quite often.
Basically, when you start noticing red flags in your relationship, this means that it is no longer a healthy relationship. If you choose to stay in the same relationship even after your partner’s refusal to change, know that you are up for emotional, physical, mental and even financial downfall.
Here are some of the most common and hidden red flags in relationships that one often ignores when in love. Without much ado, let’s jump straight to the details!
31 Relationship Red Flags You Must Never Miss Out on!
1. Frequent criticizing
Does he always criticize you or put you down for your efforts? Do you feel that no matter how hard you try, it never gets enough for him? If yes, then babe, this is a HUGE red flag that you must not ignore at all!
It is his way of making you feel insecure and hurting your self-esteem. He wants to maintain his supremacy in this relationship and wants to make you feel small and insignificant.
If, after making constant efforts, he still maintains the same temperament, my dear, you need to take actionable steps.
2. Avoiding discussions
Does your partner always run away whenever he hears the word “discussion?” If he is emotionally unavailable, or is careless, or does not want to take any responsibility, then he will walk away from discussions. He never listens to what you have to say and avoids circumstances that lead to long talks.
Being unable to speak your heart out and make your point can leave you feeling bitter. With time, your relationship will go for a toss. A lack of communication can create a void between you two.
3. Endless bouts of lying
Making false excuses and lying every now and then is another red flag that you should never ignore. If your partner is getting dishonest with you quite so often and tries to deceive you every now and then, you should take things seriously.
Frequent lying can lead to serious trust issues. You will find it hard to trust your partner and will always keep doubting him. This, in turn, will leave you drained and also gradually eat into your relationship.
4. Not willing to compromise
Every relationship should be 50-50 when it comes to love, adjustments and responsibilities. If your partner wants you to make all the adjustments and refuse to compromise at any level, then this is certainly unfair to you. Every relationship should be equal and not one-sided. A healthy relationship is one where both partners try to understand each other’s preferences, expectations and needs.
5. Extreme jealousy
If your partner prevents you from dressing up in a certain manner or stops you from going out or talking to specific people, stop seeing this behavior as “cute.” He is just getting over-possessive, nothing else!
Because of his jealousy, you won’t be able to enjoy a life outside your relationship. He will keep pestering you with calls and messages. If your partner goes green the moment you mention your male friends, ex, or even colleagues, then it is high time you reconsider your relationship.
6. Excessive controlling nature
Being in a relationship should not make you feel like you are in prison. If your partner controls you in every way and creates a ruckus the moment you fail to abide by his rules and regulations, then take this as another red flag.
If your guy controls you as if you were his toy, then there’s absolutely no future in this relationship.
7. Lack of supportive behavior
Entering into a relationship should make you feel complete. It is more like being a team and navigating the ups and downs of life together. To make things smooth, both partners should support each other unconditionally. But if your partner never appreciates your efforts or supports you in your decisions, then things are definitely going downhill.
He should be supportive enough to help you through all the challenges that life throws at you. If you are right, he should support you without fearing the judgments of society.
8. No room for healthy communication
Communication is the key to making any relationship work. If your partner does not know how to communicate in a healthy way, then this is another red flag you must consider. Pay attention if he turns aggressive or starts playing the blame game while talking it out. At worst, he will avoid communicating with you altogether.
9. Physical and verbal abuse
Being abusive in a relationship is a HUGE red flag that you MUST NOT turn a blind eye to. Does he get violent with you? Does he threaten to hit you in a fit of rage? Does he use abusive words for you during a heated argument?
Any form of abuse is not acceptable at any cost. If your partner indulges in abusive behavior during instances of disagreements, you must walk out of such a relationship without giving it a second thought.
10. Past history of infidelity
Cheating in a relationship should be illegal. PERIOD.
People come up with excuses – “I fell weak,” “It was a moment of weakness,” “It was just a mistake,” and so on. But these are just excuses, and chances are that this person will again cheat you.
If your partner has cheated on his ex or you before, then you should definitely reconsider your relationship. Most of the time, you will keep wondering if your partner is again cheating you with someone else. This will affect not just your relationship but also your mental and emotional well-being.
11. Different life and relationship goals
If the two of you do not have the same life and relationship goals, things are bound to turn bitter in the long run. For instance, maybe he wants to shift to a new place for career or educational purposes. And you are averse to this decision. Maybe you wish to get married, but your partner does not believe in the institution of marriage.
Such conflicting interests and goals can often impact your relationship. To make your relationship a smooth sailing one, it is important for both of you to be on the same page.
12. Addictive behavior
Addiction to alcohol and substances is definitely a thing of concern. If your partner is willing to correct his behavior and get rid of his addiction, then you should definitely support him.
However, if he refuses to amend his actions and chooses his addiction over the relationship, then it is high time you consider your relationship once again.
13. Not willing to gel up with your friends and family
Does your partner hate the idea of mixing up with your family and friends? Does he find excuses to cancel out plans of family get-togethers and catching up with your friends? If yes, then babe, something is definitely fishy.
14. Always involved with his friends
Do you always find him busy with his friends? Is he always making plans with his friends but has no time for you? Does he lie to you to be with his friends? Is he not serious ever about spending “us-time?”
If your partner stays unavailable for you all the time just to be with his friends, then you should definitely try to discuss this with him.
15. Maintaining excessive secrecy
Does your partner maintain excessive secrecy? If your bae keeps secrets from you and expects you to be completely transparent, then something is definitely wrong. Well, I am not asking you to go crazy over his Insta and FB passwords. But if you find him lying quite often just to keep things secret, then babe, this is a red flag you might repent later for ignoring.
16. Body-shaming and sexist jokes
Body-shaming and sexist jokes can be extremely hurtful. And when it comes from someone you love so dearly, you will feel shattered.
First things first- body shaming is uncool. Next, if your partner loves you, he will embrace all your flaws and find you beautiful the way you are. He will never demean you for your gender or physical appearance. But if he does, babe, it is high time you walk out on him. That person, my dear, does not deserve your love at all!
17. Being emotionally and physically distant
If your partner seems emotionally and physically distant, then my dear, it is not a relationship of equals.
You will want to pour your heart out in front of your partner. You will want to go unfiltered and express your feelings to him. You will love to get physically intimate with your partner. But what if he blocks you out completely?
Take it as a major red flag if your partner does not reciprocate your physical intimacy and stays emotionally unavailable for you all the time.
18. Always on their phone
If your partner keeps engrossed in his phone while out on a date with you, this can be a major warning sign for you. You should not have to try to get his attention. But if he shows more interest in his phone than in you, babe, you deserve much better!
19. Being too dominant physically
Does he force himself on you physically? Does he want to get intimate with you even when you are not in the mood? Does he completely disregard your feelings and pay no heed to the concept of “consent?”
Sex or physical intimacy is something that both partners should enjoy equally. If he uses your body to quench his lust and shows no concern for your feelings, then you should straightaway walk out of this relationship.
20. Playing blame games
In case he blames you for all the goof-ups, then take this as a major warning sign. Girl, stop behaving like a sponge that soaks up all his mistakes and blunders. He is a grown-up man and should be mature enough to take responsibility for his actions.
Instead, if he keeps blaming you for each and everything that goes wrong in your life, your relationship can be easily termed as toxic.
21. Turning a deaf ear to your suggestions and opinions
In every relationship, there should be room for discussions where a couple decides things mutually. One should not force his choices and opinions on the other partner. However, if your partner refuses to listen to your suggestions and opinion, and disregards whatever you say as irrelevant, then take it as a major red flag.
22. Being frivolous with financial matters
If your partner does not take money matters seriously, no matter how much he loves you, things will go awry in the long run. Money is a prerequisite to living a healthy and decent life. If he splurges unnecessarily, hides facts about his savings and investments, or indulges in illegal activities like betting, then you should definitely take control of your money and life.
Try communicating your ideas and thoughts to your man, and if he shows no sign of improvement, don’t hesitate to call it a quit.
23. Public humiliation
If your guy mocks you publicly or belittles you in front of the world, then you may want to take it as a warning sign. Consider if your partner is habitual of humiliating you in front of his friends and family members. If this happens on a regular basis, then it is high time you assess and evaluates your relationship.
24. Being secretive about your relationship
Does he never want to open up about your relationship with the world? Does he want to keep your relationship a secret? Is his social media status still single? Has he not introduced you to his friends and family?
Babe, if your answers are assertive, then mark my words. He is in no mood to take things further in the future. Either he is cheating on you or considers this relationship as a casual fling.
25. He is still in touch with his exes.
Being in a friendship with his ex won’t harm you, I guess. However, if he is always chatting, or on a call with, or keeps meeting his ex/exes, then babe, this is a HUGE red flag. You, my dear, need to talk to him about this and make a decision about the future of your relationship right away.
26. He is quite toxic about his exes.
If your guy seems hateful towards his exes and calls every past relationship toxic and every ex as “crazy” and “clingy,” then there’s definitely something wrong with this man. In normal circumstances, a person recalls his past relationships with a heavy heart and then moves on.
But if your partner keeps blaming his exes for all the relationships that never worked out, then dear, maybe he is the one who needs to amend his ways.
27. Extreme anger issues
It is impossible to be with someone who gets violent at the drop of a hat. If your partner has extreme anger issues, hurls abuse on you in anger, tries to hit you or throws things around in a fit of rage, then you might want to give a second thought to your relationship. You will find it hard to stay in peace with someone who loses his calm for no reason at all.
28. He is highly biased.
Is your partner sexist, racist, or homophobic? Is he biased towards a specific section of society and disregards the rest? Dating anyone who is strongly prejudiced can be a major red flag that will affect your relationship in the long run. Such biases often lead to unnecessary arguments between the partners. Sometimes, these arguments escalate to such a level that your relationship goes only downhill.
29. He does not trust you.
If your partner is always doubtful of your actions and habits and keeps asking for minor details of everyday life, then take this as a warning sign against your relationship. It is literally impossible and completely unnecessary to share details such as passwords, call logs, whom you meet, whom you talk to and so on. You will feel suffocated if you continue to be in a relationship with this man.
30. He cancels out plans at the last minute.
If your partner never initiates a date night or couple trip and cancels out the plans that you make, then babe, you should be wary about this red flag. Know that if he wants, sooner or later, your guy will definitely take time out to be with you. But if he never seems bothered about your “us time” and is eager to cancel out plans, there is no benefit in being in such a one-sided relationship.
31. He does not make efforts toward the relationship.
Are you the one who makes all the plans and efforts to keep the romance alive in your relationship? From planning surprises to sexy date nights, from managing everyday errands to paying bills, are you handling it all single-handedly? If your guy makes zero effort for this relationship, do not ignore this warning sign at any cost.
What’s the biggest red flag in a guy?
One of the biggest red flags in a guy is dishonesty. If he isn’t forthcoming about his past or present, this can be a sign that he either doesn’t want to get close to you or he may not be trustworthy. Pay attention to how open and honest he is about himself and his life, as it may provide important clues to his character.
How do you identify a red flag?
Red flags can usually be identified by paying attention to how someone speaks, how they act and interact with others and the decisions they make. If a person is more guarded or secretive about their life, that could signal a red flag.
If someone has difficulty expressing themselves, communicates in a negative way, or isn’t understanding other people’s feelings, then this can also be indicative of a potential red flag. Paying attention to these behaviors can help identify any red flags that may be present.
Wrapping Up all the red flags in a relationship!
It is important to identify red flags at an early stage of your relationship. And once you understand that things are definitely not going in the right direction, take charge in your own hand. Don’t wait until it is too late.
Babe, if you do not feel loved, wanted and respected in a relationship, nothing in this world should force you to be in that relationship. Love will happen to you again. You will get more chances to be happy in the future. But first, tend to your damaged heart before it shatters into pieces because of your toxic partner.
Babe, in the end, it’s only you that matters! Never trample your happiness to be in a toxic and soul-sucking relationship.
Sending power and light your way!
Take care, bub!
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